Politics — January 5, 2014 at 9:28 PM

Hey Duck Dynasty: 15 Year Old Girls Should Not Have Sex


duck-dynasty-menI believe Phil Robertson, star of A&E’s “Duck Dynasty” is constitutionally entitled to believe whatever racist, homophobic crazy-ass shit he’d like to believe. I also believe he should not be fired from his job or TV show for saying things I disagree with. Plus, I firmly believe I have written this post 3 days too late, but am determined to see my thoughts in print.

Oh, and lost amid the celebrating in Times Square, Phil Robertson said something — quite possibly — even crazier and more offensive — than his racist homophobic rants.

Anyway, let’s quickly re-cap a few of the crazy-ass things Phil said:

  1. “I never heard one of them, one black person, say, ‘I tell you what: These doggone white people’–not a word!… Pre-entitlement, pre-welfare, you say: Were they happy? They were godly; they were happy; no one was singing the blues.”
  2. “Neither the adulterers, the idolaters, the male prostitutes, the homosexual offenders, the greedy, the drunkards, the slanderers, the swindlers — they won’t inherit the kingdom of God. Don’t deceive yourself. It’s not right.”
  3. “Women with women, men with men. They committed indecent acts with one another, and they received in themselves the due penalty for their perversions. They’re full of murder, envy, strife, hatred. They are insolent, arrogant, God-haters. They are heartless, they are faithless, they are senseless, they are ruthless. They invent ways of doing evil.”

You see, the things I believe are different from what Phil Robertson believes. For the sake of brevity, the only people I believe who’ll be denied entry into the kingdom of heaven are the evil TV people who took my ideas (among other things) and used them on the show Mythbusters (read THAT story HERE). Oh, and anyone on the internet selling pure Garcinia extract. Seriously, what the fuck is pure Garcinia extract?

fox_news_logo_a_lNow, as you might expect, after A&E suspended Phil for his words, the FOX News Uber-2014 Doppler Hysteria Machine went into spasmodic overdrive. (It’s like “Spinal Tap” when the amp goes to “11”).

Sarah Palin said“Free speech is an endangered species,” “Those ‘intolerants’ hatin’ and taking on the Duck Dynasty patriarch for voicing his personal opinion are taking on all of us.”

Sean Hannity said: It was a “slippery slope” to begin firing people over things they said.

Megyn Kelly said“He is a Christian man — I grant you he did not say in the kindest way — but why can’t there be a debate about it? Why can’t there be a discussion … instead of ‘you are fired.'”

Mike Huckabee said: “(A) matter of his opinion based on scripture which is not really that off the wall of an opinion.”

Martha McCallum said“A&E would fire Pope Francis based on their assessment of Phil Robertson.”

Then, a week after suspending Phil Robertson, A&E reinstated him.

aandelogoA&E said“Duck Dynasty is not a show about one man’s views. It resonates with a large audience because it is a show about family… a family that America has come to love,”

“As you might have seen in many episodes, they come together to reflect and pray for unity, tolerance and forgiveness.”

(the) “coarse language” he used, and the “mis-interpretation of his core beliefs based only on the article,” adding that Phil had “also made it clear he would ‘never incite or encourage hate’.”

Cut to: December 30th, 2013. A NEW video showed up on YouTube – which you can see below — dated 2009 and in it Phil Robertson says men should marry girls when they’re young, adding:

“They got to where they’re getting hard to find, mainly because these boys are waiting ’til they get to be about 20 years old before they marry ’em,” Robertson said. “Look, you wait ’til they get to be 20 years old the only picking that’s going to take place is your pocket. You got to marry these girls when they are about 15 or 16. They’ll pick your ducks.”

Just to be clear, in 2009, Phil Robertson, the star of the series “Duck Dynasty” on A&E advocated for 20 year old guys to marry girls who are 15.

So I have six (6) questions:

  1. A&E, do you think that guys who are 20 should marry girls who are 15?
  2. A&E, do you want to reconsider your earlier statement, where you said of the Robertsons, that they are the kind of “family America has come to love?”
  3. Sarah Palin, do you think it would have been a good idea for your 2nd oldest child, Bristol, to get married at the age of 15?
  4. Sean Hannity, do you think your daughter should have gotten married at the age of 15?
  5. Sean Hannity, what would you have done if a guy who was 20 wanted to marry your daughter when she was 15?
  6. Megyn Kelly, do you think Americans should debate whether or not 15 year old girls marry boys who are 20?

Now, before any of you answer, there’s one more thing you should know:

prison-barsIn the state of Louisiana – where Ducky Dynasty takes place – it is a felony for a guy who is 20 years old to have sex with a girl who is 15 (if they’re not married).

In fact, in some US states, when a girl who is 15 has sex with a boy who is 20, that’s called “statutory rape.”

Again, Phil Robertson and I have a difference of opinion.

I believe 15 year old girls should not get married. I believe that 15 year old girls are kids who should take their time and become adult women, educated, well rounded, well read, well traveled women… before they decide to become a spouse, wife and mother.

On the other hand, Phil Robertson believes that 15 year old girls should get married… and with that, I’m assuming, he thinks they should have sex with their husband. If I’m wrong about this, Phil, who I think believes that 20 year old boys should have sex with 15 year old girls, please let me know ASAP and I will no longer believe that you think 20 year old boys should have sex with 15 year old girls.

So, while Phil and I disagree, I don’t believe that A&E should fire him for believing that 20 year old boys should have sex with 15 year old kids. On the other hand, I do believe that people who watch TV should know what the star of the most popular show on cable TV thinks 20 year old boys should do with 15 year old girls.

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